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As the late, great Joan Rivers used to say “Can we talk?!”
So you want to become famous? You don’t really have any talent? You don’t have a drop-dead face and/or body? There is nothing at all unique about you? NO PROBLEM!
I was born and raised in La La Land – a self-respecting member of Tinseltown’s elite, and I can tell you without a doubt that you have bought the right how-to book. In the chapters which follow I will guide you through:
- Pretending you have a past and a career in The Industry,
- Developing relationships with the oh-so-important media: social, television, print,
- Organizing a lifestyle that fits your newly-created personality like a glove,
- Glamour – What is it? Who has it? How to get it?
- Developing yet more relationships with the media – removing unhelpful media members,
- Who is” important” and who is marginal,
- Cultivating your newly-discovered BFFs
- Living graciously with your fame
There are two types of people who become famous just because they are perceived as being famous, and have zero talent for anything. The first is the “connected”, and the second is “famous –for-no-other-reason-than-right-place-right-time.
We are all too familiar with the first group, and they are probably why you bought this book and think that you too can achieve great heights. These “connected” types include the myriad Kardashians and the Hilton sisters, particularly Paris. It is inconceivable in this town that any Kardashian could have even gotten an appointment with an A-list plastic surgeon in Beverly Hills were it not for their deceased father, Robert ,of O.J. Defense Team fame. Robert Kardashian actually had a fairly good reputation in this town as an entertainment attorney before his untimely demise. His name got the mother and sisters good appointments at really good rates. That’s what I mean by “connected”. The next step was Mother Kardashian cashing in on her late husband’s name to get the now-stunning (with tons of make-up – helloooooo, have you ever seen them without make-up strolling around Rodeo Drive on a weekday morning?) daughters pitch-sessions with Reality TV producers and really good agents – see Chapters 2 and 5.
Reality TV is the wicked witch of the west that arrived on a cloud of smog during the Writers Guild of America strike in November of 2007, and wrecked havoc with the 2007-2008 television season. By the time a contract was reached in late February, 2008 television executives had decided to by-pass any further attempts by the Writers Guild in the future and non-scripted Reality TV was inbred by the studios. Your key word here is non-scripted, because that is how you become famous without having any talent at all!
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Tags: how to become famous, how to become famous fast, become famous, become a celebrity, how to become a celebrity, how to become famous without talent, famous people with no talent
