Have you ever wondered how to tell a difference between a shark and an apple? Or how to blurgh? Or maybe how to ride a bicycle when you’re an elephant and want to get to work quickly but there’s a traffic jam? Or maybe you’ve spent countless hours wondering how to tell your right ear that you prefer the left one? Of course you haven’t, ’cause that would be pointless.
But someone had to (HAD TO) ask those questions and someone also had to answer them. And that someone had to be someone and I’m someone as much as the next person, but he has friends, PS4 and his grandma makes the best apple-pie on this planet that we call Earth (though it would prefer to be called “Sheila”). That is why I have created this ultimate guide. It was just inescapable.
„This is the best book I have ever written, read or just simply starred at, making it feel uncomfortable.” – me.
“I haven’t really read it, I mean, I don’t like this sort of books, I don’t think they are THAT funny… but hey, I’m sure this one’s great.” – my GF. Thanks. I guess.
„This is URINE!” – my grandfather, if he was British.
