Foiled

Listing on BookAngel:


Foiled: Novella

Last Free Dates: 4th Dec 16 to 8th Dec 16
Free Today!
Read More

View on Amazon.co.uk

...Thank you for brightening up my morning with a very unfortunate phrase. Now, please, please, get a proof-reader. ...

Rajash is a detective/secret-agent off on his next mission for the Indian government. For readers familiar with British texts, think an Indian James Bond: action adventure with a girl in every port.

And I will confess up front I didn’t finish this. I didn’t get passed chapter 5.

I don’t want to go on about the writing, but suffice it to say a proofer, not an editor is needed. The author’s English is much better than my Urdu, but…

The writing style is unusual with very short staccato sentences that don’t also follow logically. I actually found it difficult to get into the story because there isn’t a natural flow from one sentence to the next. The speech punctuation is odd, with speech included in the body of paragraphs rather than starting on a new line no matter who is speaking. Some sections are oddly phrased, for example with the word “the” omitted or commas in the wrong place to create a whole new meaning. For example on the first page: “He opened a soda bottle with the opener and poured in a whisky glass to the brim.” It took me a moment to re-parse the sentence and realise he wasn’t pouring the whisky glass into the bottle. Also, expect repetition – if something can be said in one sentence, why not say it slightly differently in the following two? – and tenses shifting from past to present and vice versa.

…as I said I will confess I didn’t finish this. I was laughing too hard. During a confrontation with a customs agent it is important to note that “a slip of the tongue” does not mean the same as “almost slipped his tongue”.

This is not an endorsement of the book, but thank you for brightening up my morning.

Now, please, please, get a proof-reader.

Rating: DNF
Reviewed by
Reviewed on:
Review Policy: No compensation is received for reviews. View our Review Policy here.


Other reviews you might like:


  • One: A Way of Life
    A well constructed set of viewpoints, that you may or may not agree with.
  • Once I Was A Soldier
    definitely one for fans of the genre, international, action spy thriller with lashings of sex and secrets
  • Arunoday
    Readers of family epics or business intrigues might want to take a look at this. Romance and Women's Fiction readers should probably pick it up.

Discussion

New to the site? Leave a comment below or view the chat on our forum here:

You are commenting as a Guest: Login Or Register

Your Message



*Your email will not be displayed on the site. All message are held for moderation.